You’re The First, Virgin
Just the tip … of the space tourism market …
Man, I knew I should have stuck with regular coffee and never gotten started on Starbucks drinks.
I took my socks off and did a quick calculation, and if I add up all the extra money I would have saved by not upgrading to a chai latte over the past eight years, I’d have a little over one percent of the money I’d need to go on the first tourist flight into space.
The Virgin Galactic spacecraft is already under construction and is scheduled to make the first commercial flight in June of 2009. That’s right, next year.
That clinches it. I’m not eating for the next 12 months.
If you thought the iPhone was cool, how awesome do you think it would be to be among the first “regular” people to go into space? But like the iPhone, you’re probably better off waiting until the technology improves and the price drops.
The going price of the two hour space ride is about $195,000 at current exchange rates — or about the same as United Air Lines charges for a New York-to-Los Angeles flight if you book less than 14 days in advance.
To be totally accurate, it’s not like you’re going to be orbiting Mars or something. The Virgin Galactic will be carried into the atmosphere on the first part of the journey by the mother ship. At 50,000 feet (the cruising height of the Concorde) the Virgin Galactic will fire its own rockets and proceed to an altitude of 68 miles above the Earth.
I’m not sure who calculated it or why they chose 68 miles as the cut-off but, apparently, at that height you are considered to be officially an astronaut.
I think it’s safe to say that this makes you an astronaut the same way appearing in a sex video makes Kim Kardashian an actress.
The whole space journey only lasts two hours, not including the three hours you’ll be taxiing on the runway at JFK and the hour and forty-five minutes you’ll be delayed waiting for the flight crew to arrive from Atlanta.
You will, however, get to experience four minutes of weightlessness which is a whole lot more than the three seconds you normally get when your commuter flight hits an air pocket in bad weather.
Among the people who are rumored to have already put a deposit down for the first flight are physicist Stephen Hawking, former Dallas actress Victoria Principal and designer Philippe Starck.
Look at that … you really will be flying among the stars. (zing!)
January 23rd, 2008 at 9:58 pm
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January 23rd, 2008 at 10:16 pm
Why yes sir! I really, really want to sit next to renowned physicist Stephen Hawking and listen to his integrated voice program babble on about space and time for about two hours or so!
“If you look outside, that is the Sigma Delta Gamma Quadrant thing which I discussed in my book, ‘The Space Time Continuum and other silly space stuff’ and we are about to see it firsthand!”
Who cares if the whole thing costs more money than Bill Gates earns in an hour? Sitting next to someone who could possibly ruin the thrill of space travel just has to be worth it, right?
“Oh my. This is a new constellation which I just discovered and made up myself. I’ll see if Cambridge University can do anything to help me get it recognised as the Hawkin Constellation and…”
Because no matter how much space travel would kick ass, nothing would spoil it more than paying a metric metric shitload to sit in a space craft and have some smartassed robot geek explain everything to you, even if you don’t want him to.
“And right here is where…”
“Shut the fuck up Hawking! Shut the fuck up! This flight cost me my home, my wife, my kids and my job. I swear to god, if I hear you babble on about space and time once more, I’ll pull you out of your chair and kick that annoying voice box right up your fucking arse!”
“…”
“That’s right bitch. You may be famous and all but I’ve still got my fucking legs and I ain’t afraid to use them neither.”
January 24th, 2008 at 10:25 am
Couldn’t we just put Stephen Hawking in a room with a black curtain with some holes poked in it behind a round window and call it a spaceship?
January 24th, 2008 at 9:33 pm
Hey wait a minute! Kim was actually quite good in that movie.