Latest News from the Society for Pointless Studies
Reason #47 why the make-up guy from Cats should not, under any circumstances, be allowed to do acid…
The Drudge Report featured the following headline from Breitbart News:
Patients Get Appointments for Botox Faster than for Moles: Study
Wow. Talk about a slow news day. Let’s see… there’s mass starvation in Darfur, a nuclear threat in Iran and the upcoming premiere of Private Practice (an impending disaster of Biblical proportions) but, what the hell, let’s feature the Botox/mole study.
The results of the study showed:
“For a Botox injection, patients waited typically for eight days, while those asking doctors to look at worrisome moles that might indicate skin cancer waited 26 days, said the study in the Journal of the American Academy of Dermatology.
The study was conducted last year by telephone with researchers posing as patients, contacting 898 dermatologists in 12 US cities.
So, what you’re telling me is that somebody got a large chunk of grant money to have a couple of researchers spend a year making crank phone calls. Opie and Anthony have really fallen on hard times.
All this for a study to confirm what you already know: dermatology is boring and researchers have way too much time on their hands.
Everybody knows Botox is more urgent than a potentially pre-cancerous mole. Unless, the mole is the one on Cindy Crawford’s face - in which case, we need to take care of that right away because Cindy is a national treasure.
What mole?
I feel like I can speak with some authority medical topics since I got a “B” in the required science class I took in college and I watch House on a regular basis.
The solution here is simple. If you’re that worried about potential melanoma, schedule your Botox appointment and have them inject the botulinum toxin into the mole.
Problem solved. Roll credits….
humor, moles, Botox, Cats, Cindy Crawford,
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