One Toke Over the Line
New York City bong hits …
Talk about a buzz-kill …
A government-commissioned report in London has concluded that “a single joint of cannabis raises the risk of schizophrenia by more than 40 per cent.”
I’m pretty sure I read someplace the risk of schizophrenia is raised by 130% every time there’s a government-commissioned report.
Especially if you read that stuff while you’re high. It’ll freak you out every time … Dude, it’s like they’re talking directly to you.
I’ll have more to say on this topic as soon as the giant spiders with Larry King’s head stop attacking …
Okay, now where was I?
I saw Sicko so I know that the medical establishment in England is the finest in the world, but the claim that one joint increases your risk of schizophrenia by more than 40% just doesn’t make sense.
I’m pretty sure the percentage of people who’ve had a joint over the past 30 years has gone up by about seventy hundred percent. At the same time, I don’t remember any stories about the amazing rise of schizophrenia over the same time period.
Call me crazy, but I think somebody would have noticed that.
The other problem I have with all these studies is that you can get a doctor to swear to anything these days. With a couple of quick calls and a wire transfer you can find a doctor to swear that you can have six-pack abs in just eight minutes a day or that you can take a pill and add up to four inches to your manhood.
This kind of “research” is just ridiculous. Everybody knows the only way to get a rock-hard midsection is to use one of those electronic ab stimulators.
Coincidently, that’s also a great way to add up to four inches to your manhood. I know it’s true because I read about it in the Letters section of a leading scientific journal.
All I’m saying is we need to do more research on the whole marijuana-schizophrenia link.
I’ll get on that right after I finish these Doritos….
marijuana, pot, herb, ganja, cheeba, giggle weed, grass, cannabis, schizophrenia, British doctors, Sicko, Doritos
Ed. note - Check out some other great humor blogs at … Humor-Blogs.com
August 18th, 2007 at 7:54 pm
Wow, you are very ignorant. Not only is it true (As well as psychosis) but you obviously don’t even know what schizophrenia is with such quotes as “I’ll have more to say on this topic as soon as the giant spiders with Larry King’s head stop attacking …”
You watch too many movies. I work for a supported employment agency in Michigan and I deal with the mentally ill all day long, you can never tell by looking that they are ill and most of them do not know or will admit that they are ill, either. These are disorders that effect THINKING, cognition, perception and behavior. I wonder if you even knew that marijuana will cause depression and anxiety as well. The problem I have with you pro-weeders is that you go way too far in your belief that marijuana is safer than water. It seems just because you know a few people who smoke and *seem* fine, you think you can go ahead and disregard all of the scientific information regarding it that says that it *IS* bad and *DOES* destroy lives, it just all depends on what *YOU* consider to be *BAD* and *LIFE*. Surely you can find alcoholics who don’t mind shaking because of brain damage and you can find potheads who don’t mind being anxious, depressed, lazy and ill-cognitive. Please, get a education before posting more garbage on your blog.
August 20th, 2007 at 10:13 am
[...] a piece, One Toke Over the Line, I attempted, as the British say, to “take the piss out of” what would seem to be a [...]
August 20th, 2007 at 10:25 am
FWIW, a recap and a response to Mithotyn’s comment can be found here.