Get Incensed

One is known for his alternative lifestyle; the other is an 80’s pop icon ….

If you were shopping around for a religion, you could definitely do worse than Buddhism.

As far as I can tell, Buddhists believe in karma, a gentle approach to all living things, and vegetable spring rolls.

The vegetable spring rolls alone are enough to make you consider the religion … at least until they start making pecan pie a vital part of Scientology.

If you’re a Buddhist, you have to believe in karma because a peaceful and benevolent approach toward your fellow human beings would seem to rule out useful and practical things like revenge and the occasional well-timed bitch slap.

While I’m not a practicing Buddhist, I do take a serene, Gandhi-like pleasure in seeing karma in action.

My joy has increased as I’ve gotten older (pretty much since I stopped using fake I.D.) because, too often, it seems like the knuckleheads of the world get away with most of the stuff they pull.

So, my day was brightened when I read a story about how Girls Gone Wild creator Joe Francis complained he was being abused in prison.

The karma in this case wasn’t so strong that Francis found himself in a PMITA prison, but he did complain that guards threatened to strap him naked to a chair and to take away his blanket.

I know a few people in law enforcement. All of them have a keen sense of justice and an even keener sense of humor … which is why I doubt Francis’ claims.

If the guards were really going to mess with him they would have threatened to make him get naked in the shower and film him. Or make him strip and French kiss another inmate.

What’s even better about the story is why Francis is in jail in the first place. According to the report:

“He has been in jail since April, when he was cited for contempt after yelling at attorneys during mediation in a federal lawsuit brought by women who were underage when his production company filmed them in 2003.

That lawsuit has since been settled, but Francis’ bond was revoked on criminal charges related to the 2003 filming when he was charged with having contraband .. in the Bay County jail.”

So, basically, Joe Francis is in jail and has done seven months for being a dick.

Before anyone gets all Tony Kornheiser on me and starts telling me it’s not like Francis shot anyone or ran a dog fighting ring, let me say I get that most of the girls in his videos are, more or less, willing participants.

I also get that, while plying women 15-years your junior with alcohol isn’t illegal (and in many cases is simply a good, pragmatic strategy), subsequently filming them naked and selling the tapes doesn’t mean you should be nominated for Man-of-the-Year either.

Which is why, when you get the chance to pick between justice or karma … always go with karma.

“Always bet on karma …”