Get Incensed

“Stupid pagans…”

It’s about time we realized that cartoons and religion don’t mix. First, it was the Muslims getting their turbans in a twist about the way Muhammad was portrayed in a Danish cartoon.

Now, British pagans are upset over a chalk figure of Homer Simpson that has been drawn next to the famed (really?) Cerne Abbas chalk giant in Dorset, England. The Cerne Abbas is a giant fertility symbol has been a tourist attraction and site of pagan worship since before the 1700s.

The pagans, like the Muslims, are threatening to unleash a holy war against those who would defame their idols.

I’ve got a gut feeling that we could see an outbreak of paganism later this summer in the U.S.

The pagans have already made threats against the image of Homer Simpson. According to reports, “Ann Bryn-Evans, joint Wessex district manager for the Pagan Federation adds that they’ll be doing some ‘rain magic’ to wash it away.”

Okay, so it’s not a car filled with explosives, but this kind of behavior isn’t what you’d expect from a purported “religion of peace.”

Pagan fanaticism can’t be allowed to continue. We need to send a message to these pagans that we won’t allow them to threaten one of Fox-TV’s most profitable icons. We shouldn’t rest until we bring all the pagans to justice.

That’s why we need to send an immediate troop surge to England but … we need to make sure our troops have instructions not to fire on any pagans unless they get rained on first.

The last thing we want to do is anger the pagans so that a whole new generation of pagans, armed with spells and incantations, can wreak humidity on the free world.

And if pictures like this keep showing up on the web…

… watch out for an increase in sectarian Catholic violence.

It could be a long, hot summer.

Homer Simpson, Cerne Abbas, d’oh, pagans, Muslims, Fox-TV, England, rainy weather, Catholics, YMCA, Village People

Ed. note: For more on the story from a decidedly British perspective, check out 451 Press blogger Dave Parrack over at Pop Buzz UK